timing

There's a Right Time for Everything

 There's an opportune time to do things, a right time for everything on the earth:

   A right time for birth and another for death,
   A right time to plant and another to reap,
   A right time to kill and another to heal,
   A right time to destroy and another to construct,
   A right time to cry and another to laugh,
   A right time to lament and another to cheer,
   A right time to make love and another to abstain,
   A right time to embrace and another to part,
   A right time to search and another to count your losses,
   A right time to hold on and another to let go,
   A right time to rip out and another to mend,
   A right time to shut up and another to speak up,
   A right time to love and another to hate,
   A right time to wage war and another to make peace.

But in the end, does it really make a difference what anyone does? I've had a good look at what God has given us to do—busywork, mostly. True, God made everything beautiful in itself and in its time—but he's left us in the dark, so we can never know what God is up to, whether he's coming or going. I've decided that there's nothing better to do than go ahead and have a good time and get the most we can out of life. That's it—eat, drink, and make the most of your job. It's God's gift.

Ecclesiastes 3:1-13 [the message]

Sometimes [right now for instance], I want to curse God's timing.  Right now is my time to heal. to cry. to lament. to let go. to mend. I know God is spending time on me in this season.  I know that He plans to use it for good. 

I confidently believe that because I see it.  I see how He is working in me, molding me, transforming me, making me new.  I feel brand freaking new.  so enough! I just want it to be now.  I want to see the good now in its full extent.  no, i will not pray for patience.  in my opinion patience is the worst thing to learn. ha.

Sometimes I feel like I have had enough of these types of seasons in the last couple of years.  But clearly not.

Yes, there is still joy in the midst of suffering.  And I can't thank God enough for the moments of respite from this deep sadness that he provides for me.  But in the moments of my weakness I just don't want to walk through this.  But He gives me strength to do his will.

Thankful that he trades beauty for my ashes.  He comforts those who mourn.  Ready to be on the other side of this... whatever that may mean. 

They will be called oaks of righteousness,
   a planting of the LORD
   for the display of his splendor.

Isaiah 61